Tuesday, 17 June 2014

The "Yes" Mom

"Can't you ask her to sit down?" 

"Aren't you going to scold her?"

"If she's my kid, I am going to whack her",

said my mother and brothers. My darling dad just shook his head.

Obviously the person they were berating was me and the subject of their despair was Dragon girl.

I just shrugged, "That's just who she is and she wouldn't understand even if I beat her. Watch this,"
I grabbed hold of my daughter to keep her still for 2 seconds. She started wriggling, kicking and shouting. I looked over at my mom and said, "See? You come and try la"

After 5 minutes of going nuts, I asked for a high chair, sat her down and fed her. In 15 minutes, she went bonkers again. Usually, I will just let her be but this time, I was a little apprehensive because it was a steamboat restaurant. But it was one of those classier ones with clean floors and electrical stove. Still,  we all ate quickly and left.

Oh, Dragon girl. What am I going to do with you?
I heard all children who are born in the year of Dragon are like this. 
Haha, blame the zodiac. How professional!

I do not hit my kids. I try not to even scold or yell unless they:

1. Attempt to injure themselves. Like trying to leap of the first floor or play with fire.

2. Attempt to cause harm to others. No hitting/biting other children.

3. Think they can get away with bad attitude such as shouting at elders or kicking doors.

**Fighting among themselves are allowed as long as nobody gets killed. Bones can be mended. Wounds can be cleaned.

Coming back to my boogie woogie girl. 
That her on the stage, dancing for everyone.
Fell of the stage once and didn't even flinch. 
She just hopped right back on and continued dancing and running.
Mama is her biggest fan

I already know she will need lots of outdoor time. Probably taekwondo, ballet, gymnastics, rock climbing & drama classes just to burn off all that excess energy.

And I know she doesn't like studying like her brother. Despite being exposed to so many letters, numbers, shapes, etc......she just wants to play and play she will.

I have no expectations for her to meet. Neither do I want to force her to perform academically. She will be who she is and we will let her creativity and stubbornness shine. This one will not be a typical grade A student. She will be the one giving the teacher a headache, not doing homework, wearing nail polish, skipping classes, etc. I can feel it already.

She will always be my sweetheart and papa's little girl.
I cannot imagine how anyone can hurt little girls.
They are just so, so precious.


She is oh-so-brave, she scares me.
Never one to back down from a fight.
Ain't afraid of heights
Attempts anything without a second thought,
Not frightened of strangers, animals or the dark.
Loves the stage and attention.
Anything Tiger can do, she will try to do it better.

 I choose to believe that she is meant for big things.
And who am I to tell her no?
So, let me be the 'yes' mom.

Go, be fearless. Do your thing.
I will right behind you, guiding and supporting you.


Anonymous said...

Hi mummy, sidetrack abit. Noticed that you have used music hand bells to teach little tiger music before. Can you kindly elaborate on the exact methods? Do they prove to be effective on him though? Thanks!

Jessica Tan said...


I use them for identifying notes, together with my tuning forks, music printables and keyboard. If I have seven kids, I can make them play a song together but I have two and one of them ain't cooperative at all. So I lay them on their sides and we strike the clapper to play a song.
Dragon just arrange them randomly and sing her own do re mi song.

I am not musically trained and I doubt Tiger is musically talented. Carnegie Hall is out. So we do music to enhance math skills only. Dragon is more artistic and musically inclined, so I guess we will explore more as we go along :)


Rebecca Sia said...

good post jessica... you are a very clear, smart, understanding and supportive mummy... :)

Jessica Tan said...

Rebecca, don't flatter me laaaa. My husband also never say such things...haha! Should have married you instead :p Just kidding. Wanted to contact you when we went Penang but it was a hectic trip. Next round, perhaps?

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